Wednesday, February 25, 2009

At least it wasn't an f-bomb

The whispers started on Monday morning.
There was talk of it on the bus.
It got lost in the bustle of dinner and my arrival home on Monday evening.

But today, after school, out it came.

"Mom, do you know what an ass-halt is?"

It's a good thing I was prepared from Monday.
Monday one of his classmates came in from recess and tattled to another kid's mom that her son said asshole on the playground. I was just waiting for it to (no pun intended - eew) trickle down.

Monday night there was some whispering about someone saying it on the bus, but we shushed it in front of Bitty Girl and it didn't come up again. She already says poopy butt and butt head - I couldn't tolerate more from a 2 1/2 yr old.

So, you are asking yourself, how did I react to this question? He only gave me about 2 seconds to respond before he told me it was a butt hole.

My response?
Dude, if you're going to say it, say it right.

I told him that it was ass-HOLE, and that ass was another word for your bum, so it was really talking about a butt hole. And if you called someone an asshole that it meant you thought they were really not nice or a jerk. And it wasn't a nice word and that he would get in trouble wherever he used it. Especially at school or around his sister. So I didn't want to hear it.

It was inevitable.
My dad got his mouth washed out with soap when he was a kid for saying, "I can see your asshole" when his sister bent down to pick something up.

And the much-retold story from my mom's childhood was my grandma saying, "Must you say asshole? Can't you just say ASS?"

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

The Very Bossy Patient

Tonight. Bedtime. Bitty Girl's room, right as Daddy is about to read her a story.

Daddy: What books should we read?
Bitty: You choose. I too tired. I SICK. I can't choose a book. You choose.
Daddy: How about this one? (holds up a book)
Bitty: No. Choose George.
Daddy: (shakes head and sighs, with the all-knowing smile, and the eyes directed at me that say "This comes from YOUR side of the family!")

At least Daddy knows his place already.

**She is sick, stayed home w/a cough today. But nothing keeps the Boss down, not a nose full of snot or a chest-rattling cough.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Weekend in review

We had a short weekend getaway to Lake Chelan. I know - in the WINTER? Our big plans of some bunny hill skiing were changed at the last minute because we finally--like a month after everyone else figured it out--realized that Lake Chelan has had NO SNOW for 2 months.

But Mr. Boy-who-is-not-very-flexible was very good when we broke the news. We made big plans for bowling and maybe a movie and candy store and lots of swimming.

So here's how it went..

Saturday: SuperDaddy took each kid swimming. Separately. While I did a dinner run, because that's what happens when you arrive at 5 pm after a 3 pm lunch and realize that if you all go swimming, some small people are bound to be screaming hungry!

Much too late to bed Saturday night, after attempting to let both kids sleep in the hide-a-bed. Pack n play to the rescue!

Sunday: Fantastic hotel breakfast. This is a serious free breakfast, with an dedicated breakfast room with waffle station, eggs, cereal, muffins, juice, yogurt.

Then family swimming. Warm indoor pool, but cold run back up to the room on the outside breezeways of a hotel really meant for summer.

look who thinks he's some sort of swimsuit model
but is really sort of a swim monkey?

Bowling at Chelan Lanes
Action shot - PBA, here he comes!


No photos were taken of the minor meltdown that occurred in front of the substitute candy store. Seems that the candy store they visited in 2007 is no longer open, and although we found another store and purchased some candy, Mama opened the wrapper AT THE WRONG TIME. And that would be the 6 yr old's meltdown. Bitty Girl was too busy stuffing her face with chocolate to worry about having a fit.

Recovery and calming down was had by all, quiet hotel games were played, and we had dinner out.

Night swimming for the chlorine-logged boys, early bedtime for Ms. Pack n Play.
Monday: KIDS SLEPT UNTIL 8:00 am! More breakfast, SuperDaddy swims again with both kids. I did help get them showered and dressed.

Grand total for swimming:
Daddy - FIVE
The Boy - Four
Bitty Girl - Three
Mommy - One ( don't know how I even pulled that one off - married to a swimming angel)

Stopped in Leavenworth on the way home for a quick candy store and hat store trip.

Why we didn't ask one of the million tourists to take our picture, I don't know.
Mama and the drama-ettes

Stone Cold Bitty Girl...
who finally decided to smile when her brother left to take a picture.

But your reward for reading all the way through are the best two pictures of the trip...

A little time to get centered...

and a big brother who will hold your hand.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

If only.

Tonight, after a heartbreaking crying session because he couldn't get his "stupid hand" to write the letters the correct way, The Boy dropped this one on me.

"Mommy, I need to tell you something. You know how you walk me in to school and take me to my classroom? Well, I'm going to have you walk me in when I'm in first and second and third and fourth and fifth and sixth and seventh and eighth and ninth and tenth and eleventh and twelfth grade."

I just hugged him and told him that was fine, but if he changed his mind, I wouldn't be mad.

(I couldn't help but smile and feel slightly sick at the visual: Taller than me, peach fuzz moustache, God-forbid-a huge messy curly mop of hair, saggy pants, and his hand in mine as we walk up the steps.)

I think most of his "less than stellar" behavior lately has been from stress. Kindergarten stress. He is learning how to read, but not quite as fast as he thinks he should. And it bugs the heck out of him that he doesn't quite have the fine motor skills to easily write all his numbers and letters. He can do it, but it's a struggle sometimes.

Aaah, the life of a first baby of two Type A parents.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

Winning and Losing

Overheard while The Boy was watching the Super Bowl awards ceremony with Daddy....

Boy: Daddy, where is the Arizona coach? Why isn't he out there?
Daddy: He's probably in the locker room. He's kind of sad because his team didn't win.
Boy: Why aren't the Arizona players out there on the field?
Daddy: They're sad too. It's Pittsburgh's celebration, so the Cardinals aren't out there.

Someday soon, he will suffer a crushing defeat on the baseball or soccer field. And then he will understand why they weren't out on the field.

But today, he didn't really care that much. Because he's a Steelers fan anyway.
Remember he was only 3 during the 2006 Super Bowl, so he doesn't have the deep Steeler anger. Having my sister and the cousins in Pittsburgh definitely helps. Plus he likes to root for the favorite--higher chance your team will win, you know..

Here's The Boy, Big Ben, his Steelers helmet, and another shot of our pathetic tv. I was horrified to realize the glare is fingerprints, and I cleaned it after the photo. I can't believe I'm posting this picture, and I don't know how they watched the game, honestly.
(see below for history of the helmets)

Steelers win!

The helmets are Daddy's collection from when he was little. They were the Happy Meal-type toy from some burger place, and he must have eaten quite a few burgers. We've shown a few to The Boy, but a couple of weeks ago, he broke out the whole collection. At bedtime.
At least Mama was off the hook for getting him to bed. Once the sports questions start, I am officially off duty. I have trouble hiding my glee when that happens, and have been known to snicker out loud. I deserve it, after 6 years of being the preferred bedtime "tuck-er in-er."